Reflection on Trainings
The past few days have been a whirlwind and I am glad to finally be home here in Kerrville. I spent last Thursday and Friday in Austin at the TEC-SIG Fall meeting with colleagues in the field. It was great to see so many people out there in the field and to hear the concerns we all share! As someone new to this field, it was a little daunting too because I feel so out of of it in just trying to transition from campus coordination to district director. I am such a NEWB!
I am also someone who is constantly comparing myself to the successes of others and in that crowd, there are some monumental leaders who will always be several steps ahead of the rest of us. Renegades and Mavericks – you know who you are (and if not, I will tell you in person!) and then there are those of us just happy to be following your blogs and to read a note from you on Twitter.
I already posted about the goings on in all these trainings but I just spent 6 hours in my car with the radio off in my own personal development. My own reflexive time to start figuring out how to make this work. And I wish I had a simple answer but I don’t. I have a very hard pill to swallow and much applied learning to put in place.
I know that I am a people-pleaser. Someone who wants to make everyone happy and that means selling out my own soul at times or my own happiness to make something happen. As a campus person who was tied to the teachers, this was easy to do because I felt I was making a martyr of myself and connecting to the teachers. I was scoring points for them so that they would like me more and then that was my “in” to get them to enjoy my training. I knew this as I was doing it. I knew it wasn’t right but it was my method.
Now, I realize in my new role that this won’t work. It hasn’t yet and if it continues it will blow up in my face. I have known this for some time but was fighting it because changing my method is very hard. Why change??
I am also now a supervisor of a group of people that serve the district in their capacity. This is new to me as I have only ever before had 2 assistants who reported to someone else. This is my first supervision role. The idea of making people happy all the time will not work here either.
So, I have to change….everything.
I am freaked out by this realization and rallied by it as well. I finally feel like I have some direction and resources. The Technology Directors Academy was just what I needed. I have been so overwhelmed that I did not even know the questions I needed to ask. It is the same feeling as the first year teacher thrust into a role and learning in the first few weeks that it isn’t like the lessons in college.
I haven’t been at this for more than a few months and I have already felt regret, depression, frustration, lost, ungrounded, self-loathing, and complete distrust in my own abilities – much like the first semester of my first year.
The Academy is something I recommend technology directors take if it is their first year or their 11th. I even recommend that if your instructional technology coordinator is separate from your infrastructure tech coordinator, that the two directors attend this academy together. It is collaborative and so helpful for developing those (BHAGs – Big, Hairy, Audacious Goals) and a plan for uniting the service orientation of our jobs together. I hear how districts have that rift between instructional and infrastructure and the rift that grows year by year between them and this Academy could be a solution for you both. Really! It’s definitely a good start in the right direction.
I am looking forward to days 3-5 of this group. It was great sharing with so many varieties of technology directors at different tables and group games. I hope we continue the conversation on our blogs, wikis, and NING groups. And if any of you are reading this blog would like to add your input, I would love to share it here with the readers as well.
Here is where you can find more information from TCEA about their Technology Coordinator’s Academy: http://www.tcea.org/Training/Pages/TechnologyCoordinatorsAcademy.aspx
And a huge debt of gratitude to our excellent trainers!! Not a moment of boredom or waste in the time we were together. Thank you for sharing so many resources with us and for putting me at ease in developing an action plan!
Kari Rhame from Deer Park ISD
Robert Harris from Highland Park ISD
Lori Gracey from Bastrop ISD
